I just feel so hopeless. And I have to go put on a happy face and work in an hour and a half and all I want is for there to be cyanide nearby so I can end it.
I'm so unhappy. All I do is cry these days. And I know he has it easier because it doesn't bother him the same way. And he's got a new girlfriend anyhow so.
I just wish I didn't have to be alone. Or that I wasn't such a coward and I could just kill myself.
I wish he could take my to the psychiatric ward.
If you really loved me, you wouldn't make me hurt like this.
I'm going to chug this cough syrup and maybe things will get better.
But I doubt it.
I get it. I wasn't good enough so you go for the drug dealer.
Could have given it more than a day before putting your head in her lap.
Could have given it more than two before you invite her and her kid over without discussing it with me or B.
Could have thought about how I'd feel knowing that you're over me that quickly.
Thanks for being a douchebag.
And yeah, I don't usually mind company coming over. But when you let this 2 year old continually pick my cat up by his TAIL and don't say or do anyfuckingthing? Yeah, that's fucked up.
I get it that you want to rub my face in your skinny new girlfriend. I get it, I do. But when you see me gritting my teeth pissed about the whole situation. Just... fuck it.
You said we'd get the office clean so I'd have a room. Still not even touched. Wow.
So, you don't want me out of your room, but you do, but you don't.
It wasn't about you.
Stop assuming it was. Stop assuming everything about me.
- Music:I Don't Care - Apocalyptica
I s'pose you'd like to do as the journal tells you to then, eh? Well, I won't add you without knowing at least a tad about you; be it in real life or through LiveJournal. It's your personal decision, really.
Feel free to add my baby kitten, Degra Vash, to your LiveJournal friends as well. I post on both journals. Of course, if you were to add him, you'd have to leave yet another comment on his journal.
In case you're wondering where his journal can be located, I'll leave a link at the bottom of the page for you.
So, if you don't mind, I'd appreciate the following in your comment:
AGE: You're not idiots. How old are you?
NAME/NICKNAME: What would you like me to call you?
LOCATION: Where do you currently reside?
REASON FOR COMMENT: Why exactly is it that you'd like to befriend me? Even if it's just because we share a single interest, type it here.
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF: This is quite self-explanatory. What do you do for fun? Those types of questions. My apologies, but with the time that I do get to spend on my computer, I don't like to spend the most part of it looking at profiles from people I've never even heard of before.
Thank you for taking the time to review this. I hope that you will consider befriending this journal, as I'm not nearly as bad of a person as this makes me seem.
Oh, and for that link I was telling you about:
A. Marie ( morbidsuccubi) & Degra Vash ( lazykittie)